I come from an adoption heavy family with multiple adopted family members including my dad, who is one of my favorite people in the world world. Times 10 thousand. It's his story, and he's a private man, so it wouldn't be fair to share much about it publicly But it is safe to say that my dad didn't have the most successful adoption. It was rather messy and resulted in him having two families as a teenager that were completely separate from the people who adopted him originally. I still have a hard time explaining my dad's side to outsiders. It really doesn't make sense to the outside world at all.
I remember being about 6 years old and hearing about my dad's 'childhood'. I remember off-handed comments being made by family from the adopted side questioning whether or not I was really family. I remember clearly thinking, "This should never happen. Some day I'm going to grow up and adopt a child, and I'm going to do it right".
Because adoption is one of the most beautiful things in the world. Literally. I cannot hear an adoption story without sobbing. They wreck me. People who have adopted or are adopted can't get away, I must hear their entire story. Twice. Actually- sometimes it gets me in trouble. Back when I was a pastor, I met a little girl who was about 8 years old, her name was Lucia. I told her it was such a beautiful name and she said, "My mom got me in St. Lucia, so she named me Lucia"... instantly my eyes welled up with tears and I launched into a tirade about how special she was and how loved she must be by her parents that of all the children in the world they chose her, etc. I went on forever. Short and concise? Never. The whole time Lucia just stared at me with a look that was part 'you're crazy' and part 'obviously, I'm special' ... and I just assumed she was too young to grasp the concept. So anyway, later that day I decided to research adoption in St. Lucia to see if it was a good, ethical option. And it struck me... um... why did the little girl have big blue eyes, fair skin and super blond hair if she was adopted from St. Lucia?
Are you already ahead of me?
Her mom was using the phrase, "got you" in a much different way than my pre-disposed to adoption brain realized. It was code for "conceived". Open mouth, insert foot.
Anyway- the desire to adopt has been so ingrained and strong since childhood that I've never even wanted to birth biological children. However, it wasn't a decision I could make on my own- obviously there was this looming factor of "husband" and how he would weigh in.
If you're considering adoption, having a conversation with your family is one of the first steps.
There are a million requirements for adoption and they vary depending on what sort of adoption you'd like to commit to, but we meet the basics for most which is why we can now start. The only thing we don't have is a home, which we're hoping to purchase this year. Then we can really get moving!
Downton Abbey, Sherlock, Doctor Who) and feature elements from all of the refashions, including hand dyeing and stamping. We'll be selling them to help fund the rest of the down payment on our home and the adoption process (which if done internationally can soar to 60K). This will take us a few years, but we're commited. If you'd like to help- please consider buying one of these awesome ADOPT shirts. The highlighted ADOPT on back was inspired by a shirt from Whatsewever Designs. We wrote to her and asked permission to use the idea and it was given, please do not use the idea without her consent. The rest of the design is ours. We'll be selling them from Etsy for $20. Each is hand crafted and therefore they vary and have slight imperfections- just like people :).
We just can't say how happy we are to start the process. We talk about and pray for our little person all the time, and can't wait to meet him or her. I just know, know, know how special s/he is. And John is going to be the best, most loving and patient dad in the world. And I'm just going to try to refrain from checking every cold symptom on WebMD and thinking s/he has cancer. Just kidding. Kind of. :)
*Black background photos by the incredible Sharon of ERTHTONES.com
** I was talking to a friend and I wanted to add a little bit. Adoption isn't for everyone- and that's ok, we totally get that. Raising your own natural children isn't for everyone. Having children *at all* isn't for everyone. We all have different passions and pursuits in life, and blending together creates a beautiful society. No judgement here. <3 p=""> 3>