Waiting on Dreams & Peonies

I am a lover of plants.

I come by it naturally, my mom is an excellent gardener and her mother also excelled in loving green things. My grandma even had a "secret garden" inspired by the book which was just as enchanting and charming as you can imagine. She had bleeding hearts and wild, heirloom roses that filled her property with their perfume-like scent. And, because of my mom, I have a cutting of those very same roses in my garden.

I'm not as good at it as they are. I have the love and not the talent. Houseplants do better here, and my home is filled with them- which is interesting since both of those women have very black thumbs once the plants come indoors. But they do well here and I love them. Outside I stick with simple things that grow easily and don't require much care. I have scads of roses and lavender and mint, things that come back every year and I never prune them, even if I should.

I also have peonies. Six bushes of peonies.

My mom grows them and my grandma grew them and I wanted them too, but had no idea what I was doing. I purchased them at the end of summer the year we bought our home and planted them in my bed (with no consideration to sun or location!) in the Fall and eagerly awaited the arrival of Spring so I could cut zillions of them and bring them indoors to swoon over.

Spring came, and I saw them starting to come up. It was so exciting! I went out to check on them every day. But... they never produced.

The next year was the same story.

And the next year again. 

I was really discouraged by this point and had mentioned it to my dear friend Liz (over at Broken Called to Beauty and you should check her out immediately) who grows scads of peonies at her home many times. I asked my mom. I even asked my brother, who is no gardener at all and has rows of peonies! I couldn't figure out why my peonies weren't producing and it was so frustrating! I was starting to think about moving the six bushes or just giving up on them entirely. Finally I consulted my friend google, who told me that peonies don't particularly like the location they were in and need plenty of sun, but also... they need plenty of time. If you move a peony or plant a new one, they can take up to four years to produce blooms. 

This is the fourth year. 

I noticed little buds on three of my plants early in the season, but didn't want to become too hopeful since I've seen buds before. They grew and grew. Some of them started to turn black, and I thought it was going to be another unsuccessful year.

And then the magic happened! Literally, overnight they started blooming. Today I'm staring at this vase which started with one glorious bloom this morning and now has six, with two more on the way.

And it made me think about my life. And dreams. And all the really important things... the desires of my heart. They're so much like these silly peonies and our lives are so much like a garden. It can be so hard to watch and water and wait... and still believe we will see our dreams come to pass. Or believe for the desires of our heart.

I know what it means to watch and wait. I know what it means to watch baby after baby fill the arms of happy mothers while mine remain empty.

I know what it means to have deep dreams and feel like time is slipping away along with them.

But today was a reminder that these dreams, these desires are peonies. They take time. I can't give up... because they very well could bloom overnight! We never know the moment when the waiting will be over. All that time, the peonies weren't idle. They were growing and preparing. No time was wasted. No time IS wasted. 

So for those you who perhaps, like me, need the reminder... here it is. 

Psalm 37:4 - Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Psalm 20:4 -May He give you what your heart desires and fulfill your whole purpose.

I know so many of us are waiting for things to happen in our lives, or for something from God. And one of the biggest temptations is to give up - to say that if nothing has happened so far, then nothing will. It isn't easy to keep doing what we know to do when we aren't seeing what we as humans think are "results". C.S. Lewis said, 

“When we carry out our "religious duties" we are like people digging channels in a waterless land, in order that when at last water comes, it may find them ready.”

We want to be ready when the water at last comes. Keep doing what you know you're to do. The water will come, the peony will bloom. 

I'm praying for those of you who are waiting. Praying you will find all of your everything in Him who holds all of our everything. He is so good. And He is enough.

And may He bring your garden into bloom. 

Christmas Inspo + DIY Glittered Ornaments (External!)

HAPPY DECEMBER!

The Christmas season is my very favorite time of year, and it is upon us again!
Every year my husband and I have a party in November (like... 3 weeks ago, haha!) to usher in the season and celebrate "The Most Wonderful Time Of the Year"!

I wanted to talk to you guys a little bit today about Christmas and our trees. We LOVE decorations and have five trees in our house! Two main, one mid sized and two miniatures.

I like to change up the two main trees annually to make Christmas feel fresh each year and to keep them from becoming dated. But since I'm super frugal (read: cheap), there is a system to it!

And here it is! Tub organization.
This is probably the least glamorous blog picture in recent history, but this is how we change up the trees annually.
After Christmas, I cruise the sales when they're crazy cheap- 70% off at least. I look for ornaments in ANY COLOR we like. Any color. Especially bulbs. I think you can get like 25 bulbs at Target after Christmas for around $3, so it's super affordable. Then the ornaments/bulbs come home and are sorted by color into these tubs! After that, I have an entire year to decide how I want to do our trees. Our main trees are white and green so that we have more combination possibilities. This year we did our green tree with white and silver decorations and our white tree with a champagne/gold and blush pink decor.
I didn't have enough blush colored ornaments and could not find the color I wanted after several trips to different stores, so I had to create my own bulbs.
I wanted to go glittered, but all tutorials online were for the INTERNALLY glittered ornaments, and I wanted mine to be externally glittered.

So basically I just experimented and made my own using this glue + some thick glitter from Hobby Lobby, both of which I already had on hand.

I used some extra gold bulbs that were a little too dark and not champagne enough and just coated them with the glue.

After that, I shook the glitter on and placed them into egg cartons and mason jars to dry for 12-24 hours. It isn't a bad idea to do half of the ornament at a time so that you don't smudge the glitter and glue with your hands or the drying crates. Once they're dry, you can flip and do the other side.
You could also just do dots of glue for a polka dot look or even stripes :)

So far they're holding up really well! I'm going to spray them with some clear glaze spray paint when the tree comes down and then store them for the year. I'll let you know how they hold up!

One last pink tree look! I often use floral stems as tree toppers, especially on the white tree which tends to be super girly. The one I've been using for a long time was too bright and too dark for this new scheme. My mom had given me a grab bag of floral stems last year and these were included and PERFECT for the lighter tree. This is about 9 stems worth. I cut them all away from the stem and used floral wire to attach them in bunches and then secured bunches to the tree with wire in groups of three. The flowers go all the way around the top of the tree.

Here's a little look at our other main tree. To be honest, I did this same configuration last year, too. I really liked it and wanted another year before trying something new!

If you're wondering what we do with sentimental ornaments, because I am SUCH a sucker for sentiment, they do go out each year too. We have a small tree that we call the "Grandparent tree" which is filled with ornaments from our deceased grandparents' trees. I can't imagine not putting them out each year. They're so special, and the holidays are when I miss my family the most. My grandpa LOVED Christmas in a way that I've never seen since. 

Here are a few of my favorites from the grandparent tree. The gold swan + pink ornament are from my grandma's tree and the little tea kettle is from John's grandmother's tree. Our grandmas actually died within three weeks of each other a few years ago. It's so nice to think of them and remember Christmas traditions at their homes each year when we put up ornaments from their trees.

What are you doing for your trees this year? Any great tips? Feel free to weigh in below, and as always, thanks for reading!

Veils En Pointe- A Styled Bridal Shoot

A little something different for you today! Many of you know about my journey with ballet. It's a total labor of love rather than a natural ability.
My mom started taking me to see the Nutcracker as a very small child (early elementary) and we have gone annually ever since. As I got older, she took me to see other performances as well- Swan Lake, Romeo and Juliet, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella... anything Russian that came to our state, we saw. I danced a bit as a child, and a lot as an adult but have *always* been exceptionally drawn to the art. Many dancers see ballet as an avenue to other forms of dance, or at best a foundation. But for me, ballet is the epitome of dance.
So, I was honored when Nicole of N. KRISTINE PHOTOGRAPHY asked me to participate in a styled bridal shoot that was themed around the grace and beauty of ballet.

The shoot was originally featured by ARTFULLY WED but, I'll be showing you my favorite pictures from the shoot, many of which haven't been featured yet, and giving a little behind the scenes info about the experience.

We shot back in March of 2017 on a cold day in Michigan. The venue was gorgeous with distressed walls and muted colors that played perfectly into the palette. If you were to go and rent this space, it would obviously be heated, but the floor we were on was unheated that day and so cold! The (beautiful) wooden floors were also uneven- there was even a warning sign posted, which was an interesting turn of events for a dancer. Between the numb feet and uneven floors, combined with the weight of the dresses and bouquets, this was challenging. I shouldn't have been, but I was surprised at how much more difficult it was to balance en pointe and hold poses in this situation. That was the difficult part for me- just realizing in the moment that this would be 20 times harder than anything I've done on stage or in a studio and having no way to go back in time to prepare. But that's kind of ballet in general- you can never go back and redo a performance.

Ballet is a struggle toward unachievable perfection. My first (adult) instructor and very dear friend told me that with all art- you cannot look back, but only forward, after it is created. While perfection in ballet is an unattainable goal- the crew we worked with absolutely hit the nail on the head. I'm so excited to share their work with you.
The above two photos were taken at the last minute on a different floor. The dress was actually too big for me, so we originally planned not to use it, but it was the only one short enough to showcase ballet or movement. When we were nearly out of time, with just a few minutes left to shoot, we threw it on and snapped a few photos. They ended up being my favorites.

All of the dresses from ALI NICOLE BRIDAL and DETROIT BRIDAL HOUSE took our breath away. Loads of lace, separates, miles of tulle... they are beautiful and timeless choices. The owners of each shop were wonderfully helpful with great suggestions and personalities that would set any bride at ease. I didn't get the chance to visit Detroit Bridal House in person, but I did spend some time at Ali Nicole Bridal and LOVED her boutique! I would definitely plan a return visit to pick up cute accessories and clothing.

The veils, from KATHRYN ANN BRIDAL, made me regret my own wedding day! Ladies, if your day is still ahead of you... please order something from Kathryn. Her work is handmade, custom and the passion she has for marriage is reflected in each veil she creates. They will truly be your crowing glory! I've already told Kathryn that if we ever have a vow renewal, I'm coming to her!

She even has a blush veil, pictured above, which made my heart soar.

























On set, we had two models, myself (for ballet inspired shots) and an actual model, Tara (for the rest). It was a joy to work with Tara (instagram as @tarafromearth) who is wildly talented. She's an obvious beauty, but also so much fun and easy to be around. I can only imagine how useful her natural intuition in modeling is to those who are photographing her. Tara is so lovable!
It could have been slightly awkward to shoot these photographs, having never met each other before- but it was not! Tara is hilarious, and right after the above right photo she whispered to me, "Sorry about my breath, I just ate an onion bagel." ... it was so unexpected and fantastic that I instantly burst into ugly laughter. The resulting picture was very authentic, but I refuse to share it with you :) When I say ugly laughter- I mean... mega ugly laughter. P.S.- her breath was fine!

Let's take a moment to appreciate these arrangements. Anemones, ranunculus, shades of blue and blush. Swoon-worthy. BLOOM is renowned in the wedding business having won countless awards and also having been featured in many publications. Samantha, who is their lead designer and studio manager is *very* good at her job. She's detailed, precise and ahead of the trend.
I really loved the idea of a bouquet meant to be held upside down, which you can see in most of the more ballet inspired pictures. Samantha had to teach me how to hold it, which was slightly embarrassing.

These invitations from THE INK-STAINED MINSTREL are so well done and perfectly curated. This was one of the only vendors I sadly didn't get to meet, but would love to comment on the beauty of her work!

PRIMP did our hair and makeup for the shoot. I was impressed by their level of knowledge and attention to detail. Kathryn gave each team member photographs of her vision and direction, they took that info and ran with it. They required perfection from themselves, while still having an environment full of fun and laughter- a place any bride would want to prepare for her big day! They're also in The Knot hall of fame, which is a pretty fancy feather to have in one's cap!
You can see the (real) floral comb created by BLOOM in these photos as well. I was pretty excited when Samantha told me I could keep it! I dried the entire comb and am saving it for just the occasion.

And of course, I can't say enough good things about Nicole, from N. Kristine Photography. Nicole is truly a gift to this world. Her vision, thoughtfulness and talent come through in every shoot she spearheads. She is a dear friend and I'm very familiar with her work. Her use of light creates such an ethereal quality in her photographs. She makes everyone around her feel comfortable, which is such an important part of photography! And of course, her final product is of the highest caliber.

This was an eventful day that will go down in history for me as another notch in a dream achieved. I continue to train in the art of ballet, and aspire to get better every day in order to teach those behind me to the best of my ability. I would love to try something like this again!
Be sure to check out the vendors for more inspo!
Vendor list
Photography: N. Kristine Photography
Veils: Kathryn Ann Bridal 
Floral: BLOOM
Hair/Makeup: Primp 
Dresses: Detroit Bridal House and Ali Nicole Bridal
Models: (Instagram), @Tarafromearth, @Aunak
Invitations: The Ink-Stained Minstrel
Venue: Ford Piquette Avenue Plant